Can we simmer down and Ava Fabian Archivescan it with the Tide Pods already?
It was semi-fun and highly poisonous for a while, but if we see one more edible Tide Pods variation we might just burst a blood vessel.
Oh! Here's a pizza version!
SEE ALSO: Please spare a thought for the manager of Tide's Twitter accountHopping aboard the Tide Pods meme bandwagon, noble Brooklyn crusader Vinnie's Pizzeria is attempting to curb the trend of moronic daredevils consuming laundry detergent that apparently resembles candy.
They're making "Pied Pods," stuffed with mozzarella cheese and pepperoni, topped with blue-dyed cheese "for that hypnotic pizzaz."
Honestly, they look pretty average — nowhere near as close to the product as Tide Pod sushi or Tide Pod doughnuts — but wecanget behind their genuine quest to turn blockheaded teenagers away from poison food back to real food.
"Listen. We're concerned about the youths. They're eating laundry detergent pods. We needed to do something," the Vinnie's team captioned the post, which for some reason seems to have been initially pulled from Instagram.
"We're hoping that Pied Pods will be a gateway food for kids to get back into actual food."
Gateway food.
What the heck kind of numbskulls have we become? Retailers have had to lock the pods away. The 'Tide Pod Challenge' and similar videos are being bannedYouTube. Tide itself was directing people to Poison Controlon Twitter.
Can we just stop putting anything Tide Pod shaped, whether actual pods or pizza shaped ones, into our mouths at all? Nobody is winning here.
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